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The Hopeless Romantic: Lost Loves
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The Hopeless Romantic: Lost Loves
In preschool, I was in love with a girl named Elizabeth. It was a simple kind of love--we held hands, and that was the most important thing in the world. She made me nervous, but I was so devoted to her that I would even neglect my guy friends, who had many a He-Man action figure and Transformer, just so I could play 'House' with Elizabeth.
By the end of preschool, Elizabeth and I were inseparable. Everyone would make fun of us, but we didn't care. A year 'together' and we were two happy kids.
Then, after preschool, she moved, to England, or somewhere far away. She sent me a postcard with her address. I lost it. Life has a funny way of treating you that way sometimes.
Ok, so it was a semi-depressing story. But it has a purpose--really. There have been a few lost loves in my life so far. Elizabeth was one. The others were scattered... but one of the most important has been going on from age 8 to today (Age 18).
I won't say her name here. If she ever reads this, she'll know it's about her, and the rest of you might learn something, or at least understand me a little better--and that's good enough for me.
She and I were best friends, on and off, since the third grade. Since last year, we've lost contact, and not because of physical distance, more because of emotional turmoil. I was/still am in love with her, and she has a boyfriend. She's a truely good person, and has a wonderful heart, and for the rest of my life, I'll consider her one of my best friends. But I always had something more for her, something I tried to explain once or twice, but could never really get across to her. She was more important to me than any stupid event that occured in my puny, or anyone else's puny high school career.
Most people would tell me to forget about her. But I'm not that kind of person--which you probably know, if you've read my articles so far. And I don't know if I've given up on trying to love her, trying to be with her, but I do know how I'm able to be happy about her. There were times with her, times I can't forget--times when we were closer than any friends could ever be. They were definitely happy times. And having a photographic memory, I can call those times up whenever I feel down, and I just feel... restored.
She always has been, and always will be, a love of mine. Could I tell her to her face? Probably not... but I can tell others that if you have a true love, you should not let it go. You'll find yourself yearning for those better times. And trust me, it helps if you remember those times. But if you have it in your hand, or right in front of your face, think about it, or your love might end up becoming lost--and not so many people can be as hopeful as I will always be.
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© 2001 Charles Cotterman
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