www.storymania.com
Storymania Logo

 

 

Short Stories




Beyond Death by Robert A Ferguson A short piece on a love reaching through war and beyond death. [275 words]
The Man by Mike McWade The Man takes a break from the stiffs at work only to run into more. [1,243 words]
The Ballerina by Ashley Miranda Mary loves ballet and studies at a ballet school, but she sure is shaken up when she finds out th... [1,333 words]
The Exploits Of Tal'on Kepp by Michael Harris This is a short story set in my Chronicles of Zefaria series. I hope that all enjo... [2,542 words]
Better With Age by J Shartzer A young couple enjoy their new home, and a barrel of brandy... [1,117 words]
Randy And Sarah by Z E S Carothers A story about two young kids. A boy that lives by himself in the forest and a girl that is his ... [3,211 words]
You Don't Have To Talk... by Harvey Kennett When you are shy, and cannot find the words to say, say nothing. [607 words]
Wto Rally The Final by E Rocco Caldwell Joe has a rude awakening. [548 words]
Why Must You by Lucy Midnight - [1,593 words]
What If I... by Lucy Midnight Campfire Tales. [1,076 words]
Waiting In The Desert by Mihai Pruna The caravan pulled off the interstate on a county road. Soon they abandoned that as well ... [1,850 words]
The Unwanted by Lucy Midnight Campfire Tales. [2,159 words]
The Tower by P J Francis A man wrestles with his actions. [226 words]
The Sucidal Games by Lucy Midnight Internet Relations. [1,029 words]
The Story Of The Blanket by Patti Merrill A short story. [668 words]
The Spectator by Harry Buschman The story of a deaf man's contribution to the war on terror. [2,240 words]
The Rich Little Chipmunk by John C Popiel This is a story about how a five dollar bill travels through three different people an... [707 words]
The Mansion by Laura Depriest This is a short story for young readers about aging and leading a full life in the context of livin... [2,923 words]
The Magic Lamp by Somdev Mukherjee A story about Varun - a little boy brought up in a busy modern city with all its problems for th... [1,092 words]
The Holly Tree by P J Francis A dark fantasy tale. [1,399 words]
The Guitar Man by Jason Taylor The Bloodman A war veteran flips out. [499 words]
The Friends by Lucy Midnight ... [1,416 words]
The Forces Between by Lucy Midnight ... [977 words]
The Cubicle by D G Williford Working in a box and what is does to the psyche... [104 words]
The Adventuresof Archie 5b - The Army Surplus Salesman's Tale
The Adventures Of Archie 7 - The Puzzleman's Tale by Xoggoth Archie finds he is not alone in the valley. He shares it with... [2,988 words]
The Adventures Of Archie 6 - A Peaceful Solution by Xoggoth Following a Little Boy explosion Archie find himself on a deso... [1,271 words]
The Adventures Of Archie 5a - The Army Surplus Salesman by Xoggoth Archie learns the truth they try and keep from us, that... [913 words]
The Adventures Of Archie 4b - The Great Regurgitato's Tale by Xoggoth Continued. [823 words]
The Adventures Of Archie 4a - The Great Regurgitato by Xoggoth Achie learns of the greats of bodily functions and meets th... [781 words]
The Adventures Of Archie 3 - The Spider Catcher's Tale. by Xoggoth Archie escapes from the paralysing purple and find hims... [1,313 words]
The Adventures Of Archie 2 - The Little Demon's Tale by Xoggoth A hell spawned satanic creature identifies too much with m... [901 words]
The Adventures Of Archie 1 - The Great Escape by Xoggoth A sort of Alice in Wonderland meets Canterbury Tales sort of thin... [473 words]
Test Song by Jeff T Kane An alien invasion seen from a religious ant's point of view. [5,341 words]
Te Quiero by Lucy Midnight Hannah and her boyfriend Cody are getting serious when Hannah learns that Cody has cancer. [1,108 words]
Room 86b by Lucy Midnight ... [2,284 words]
Right Place, Wrong Time by Maggie Danials A story about sex. [487 words]
Retribution And New Beginnings by Erasmus Flynt Secrets will out. [8,764 words]
Radia by Z E S Carothers The begining of one of my books. Tell me what you think about it. [814 words]
On The Bus To Town by Sam Vaknin The announcer warns of imminent terrorist attacks on public transport. It recommends to err ... [2,713 words]
Nightmare by Inchara Incident faced by a girl returning home late in the evening. [1,268 words]
Monty On The Run by James Bondjamesbond The second instalment - Monty in deeper water. [1,226 words]
Miranda And Her Doll by P J Francis A sweet little girl...or is she? [1,187 words]
Love Of The Mountains Or So They Thought by Lucy Midnight ... [1,335 words]
Like Ocean's Eleven by Higgins This story takes place in a military setting, mainly Point Barrow, Alaska. Russian officers... [1,414 words]
It Happens by Lucy Midnight - [1,634 words]
Introducing Monty Finch by James Bondjamesbond This is the first chapter of my Monty Finch series. In this first instalment our hero f... [2,432 words]
In Capable Hands by Erasmus Flynt Or are we? [212 words]
Hunters Moon by P J Francis A creature is hunted. [1,768 words]
Hook by Amanda Connison Written for the PA Govenor's School. [1,855 words]
Gold by P J Francis Lost hopes... [243 words]
Girls Vs. Boys by Lucy Midnight Madison and her boyfriend Scott break up and then he asks her to marry him and she declines. She... [2,015 words]
Girl In The Rain by Rowan Davies We always think of ourselves as individuals, until we notice that there are other individuals ... [505 words]
Expectations by Jacson A Bevens A tale about what can happen when expectations are laid aside and feelings take over. [1,220 words]
Devastation 2 by Buxton The journal piece of the only women left after the end of the world. 34 year old Emily Carter's d... [448 words]
Deep Fur by Jeff T Kane The downfall of a corrupt lion judge in Long Island. [6,460 words]
Cluedon't by Tomphil Baed on the popular board game, what will happen when Edward and his wife go round to play Cluedo wit... [3,567 words]
Black Widow by Lucy Midnight Kayli, Becky, and Eddy are three sisters that lose their only living relative left. Kayli and Eddy ... [3,096 words]
Being An Atheist Is Hard by Aaron Horn A guy spills the beans to his mom that he doesn't believe in good ol God. [626 words]
Bare Facts by Partha Pratim Majumder When western culture and western fashion representing economic power of West has been making serious... [1,461 words]
At A Wto Rally by E Rocco Caldwell - [853 words]
At A Wto Rally (Part Three) by E Rocco Caldwell Joe gets his first lesson as to what is the consortium. [435 words]
At A Wto Rally 4 by E Rocco Caldwell Joe confront the internal workings of the consortium. [723 words]
Allefureine by Tomphil A story about a clash of cultures between a race of alien creatures and humans. [463 words]
Alice In Wonderland by Katy Pierce It's a newer version of Alice in Wonderland . . . Alice goes to a party, gets druggged, and... [782 words]
A Tough Day-1 by Sukesh Srivastava A common,innocent man when caught in a tricky situation with the police authorities, finds himsel... [3,142 words]
A Stroll Through The Beach Sands by Ravikumar Hariharan About how we lose innocence with age. [553 words]
A Perfect Crime by P J Francis One womans vengenance as a perfect crime. [1,048 words]
A Marriage Made In Heaven by P J Francis A tale of revenge. [936 words]
A Beheaded Cart by Sam Vaknin My grandfather had one love: my grandmother. A ravishing, proud, raven-haired woman. A framed r... [1,508 words]

Go to page: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 [27] 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49
TITLE (EDIT)
The Adventuresof Archie 5b - The Army Surplus Salesman's Tale
DESCRIPTION
Continued.
[1,116 words]
AUTHOR
Xoggoth
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
-
[March 2004]
AUTHOR'S OTHER TITLES (25)
A Capital Fart (Short Stories) The redundant London underground is pressed into service to win a world farting contest. [736 words] [Humor]
A Wrong Turn Somewhere (Short Stories) Somewhere near Birmingham a driver takes a wrong turn and loses everything. [492 words] [Mystical]
Amnesty (Short Stories) A gun amnesty in a rough borough of London goes idiotically wrong. [561 words] [Comedy]
Arnie (Short Stories) A little labourer has a terminator approach to his work. [646 words] [Humor]
Back To The Garden (Short Stories) Depressing the extent to which everything is being dumbed down these days. Poor state education? Is that all it is? [527 words] [Mind]
Changing To Go Out (Short Stories) In the aftermath of the genetic bomb, a simple night at the pictures with the missus is no easy task. [444 words] [Humor]
God's Trainees (Short Stories) Him upstairs is thinking of retiring, all he needs to do is train up some suitable replacements. Easier said than done. They just don't make deities the way the used to. [1,570 words] [Humor]
Mementoes Of Treasured Occasions (Short Stories) A struggling photographer finds a rich new source of business. [496 words] [Humor]
Providing For Sarah (Short Stories) A desolate man finds comfort in an imaginary (?) companion. But who will care for her when he's gone? [883 words] [Mind]
Sex Life Of The Amoeba (Short Stories) A serious paper on cellular mytosis in a well known eukarytic organism. The dirty little... [1,108 words] [Humor]
Soup (Short Stories) A soup manufacturer ends life on Earth. [514 words] [Comedy]
The Adventures Of Archie 1 - The Great Escape (Short Stories) A sort of Alice in Wonderland meets Canterbury Tales sort of thing but sillier than the former and even more boring than the latter. In episode 1 our elderly rabbit hero escapes his hutch and disappe... [473 words] [Humor]
The Adventures Of Archie 2 - The Little Demon's Tale (Short Stories) A hell spawned satanic creature identifies too much with men and falls to their level. [901 words] [Humor]
The Adventures Of Archie 3 - The Spider Catcher's Tale. (Short Stories) Archie escapes from the paralysing purple and find himself in a world where an avoidable infestation has eaten all the perspective. There he meets the spider catcher and learns why ballroom dancing i... [1,313 words] [Humor]
The Adventures Of Archie 4a - The Great Regurgitato (Short Stories) Achie learns of the greats of bodily functions and meets the greatest of them all. [781 words] [Humor]
The Adventures Of Archie 4b - The Great Regurgitato's Tale (Short Stories) Continued. [823 words] [Humor]
The Adventures Of Archie 5a - The Army Surplus Salesman (Short Stories) Archie learns the truth they try and keep from us, that being disembowelled is fun, meets a descendant of the Piltdown man and travels to the army surplus fair to find Little Boy is no bargain. [913 words]
The Adventures Of Archie 6 - A Peaceful Solution (Short Stories) Following a Little Boy explosion Archie find himself on a desolate plain and meets two tribes who are too stupid to realise that war and bloodshed are by far the most efficient means of resolving disp... [1,271 words] [Humor]
The Adventures Of Archie 7 - The Puzzleman's Tale (Short Stories) Archie finds he is not alone in the valley. He shares it with a man in a very strange prison. You have to endure a little homily on man's inhumanity to decorating materials first. [2,988 words] [Humor]
The Fly And... (Short Stories) That Geoff Goldblum had it easy! One fly?? I should have been so lucky! [483 words] [Humor]
The Horrid Tale Of Evil Worm (Short Stories) A rare accident in the vegetable patch transforms a humble earthworm into a satanic being. [1,158 words]
The Several Voyages Of Fat Tony (Short Stories) Foul deeds on the dead sea coast get their richly deserved comeuppance. [1,377 words]
The Two Bills (Short Stories) William Shakespeare fails to get to grips with Microsoft Word. [777 words]
Vomiting On Tony (Short Stories) The Mad Messiah (AKA Tony Blair) gets what he thoroughly deserves. [499 words] [Humor]
Your Little God Is Pooh And Creepy Too (Short Stories) Only the innocent find salvation. In the run up to the revelation the kids of St Crispin's Middle School are introduced to their own little salvations. PS I know Buddha was not a god, it's creative l... [1,442 words] [Humor]
The Adventuresof Archie 5b - The Army Surplus Salesman's Tale
Xoggoth

The Itinerant Army Surplus Salesman's tale

I used to have a little village shop you know, inherited it from my father. Usual small stuff that small people in small villages need. Cornflakes, elastic bands, light bulbs, elastic bands, sticking plasters, dog food, elastic bands, newspapers, that sort of thing. Did I mention elastic bands? But I wanted to travel, see a bit of the world. So I sold up and invested the cash in a business based on the real passion in my life. Military history, especially defensive military history. Nuclear warheads and sieges and Blitzkriegs all seem very uncivilised to me, but I love earthworks, trenches, fortifications, trench warfare, battlements, trenching tools, trench foot. Anything with a defensive military flavour especially if it's trench related or contains the word trench. There's something about being dug in, stuck in a muddy hole in the ground for years that encapsulates everything that's fine and noble and decent about humanity. Here I am and here I stay it says. I've never been happier. Only thing I can honestly say I miss about the old life is the elastic bands, but that's hardly surprising as they played a very big part in trench warfare as you probably know.

Anyhow, been on a trip round Europe this winter, Mons, Flanders, Ypres, all the really good places, looking for stuff to sell this summer. You can still see the trenches in some places you know, preserved, and there's the little signs everywhere for those of us who know and love trenches. Just think what it was like for those chaps. The pointless slaughter, gangrene, shells, mud, trench foot, cold, gangrene, damp, bad food, gangrene, stench of dead bodies, gas, being wounded, gangrene, seeing your comrades being killed. It must have been just... WONDERFUL. Bulbo's eyes misted over at the thought of such bliss and trench foot and gangrene and the big red lorry veered across the central reservation barging a minibus full of Jehovah's Witnesses off a cliff. The tachograph did not record such accidents so it was a real bonus.

When they got to the Northern Forces Surplus show, Archie did his very modest best (he was a Rabbit) to help unload. Thanks to his heritage, Bulbo had enormous strength and they very soon had their stall all set up. It was fairly unexciting stuff, gas masks, locker boxes, lots of trenching tools, some rather mouldy boots with very mouldy feet still in them (Bulbo had labelled them "Genuine trench feet from Ypres") and a few rusty munitions. He wondered how Bulbo managed to make the sort of living his big house in Sussex suggested. "I expect you're wondering how I make a living out of this stuff" said Bulbo. "It fetches about enough to pay for my trips and the lorry usually, but the real profit is in the special stuff. He tapped on the nearest of three boxes behind the stall. "We don't get these out until the serious collectors turn up for the auction after the public show". Came closing time and Bulbo was very pleased. Black and green was fashionable that year and his mouldy trench feet had sold briskly to ladies wanting them as fashion accessories. He had very soon sussed the market and doubled his prices. He rubbed his hands, a good day so far but now for the real profit!

He hauled out the top box. It seemed very old and had German writing on it. He opened it, turned it upside down and shook it. The world went dark and eerily grey. There was an immense thundering noise and Archie had an impression of huge things falling all around him. Then the darkness cleared abruptly. To reveal an immense concrete pillbox. By shear good fortune it had placed itself neatly on top of the Red Cross tent crushing everyone inside. There was a long earthen embankment stretching away from the pillbox in both directions. 200 yards away another pillbox had landed on the WI tent squashing all the worthy ladies within. Never mind. Just think of all the jam they'll have to sell next year. The line of embankments and the pillboxes went in both directions and as far as Archie could see. "Magnificent isn't it?" said Bulbo, "got it under the counter, if you know what I mean, from a chap in a little village on the German border. The Siegfried Line, genuine, almost complete, only one user, full service record and I've still got the original box. Should fetch a packet from a real collector"

A small dapper man wandered over. It was obvious that he and Bulbo disliked each other intensely. "Look out, Fred Fannyflaps. The chap's a scumbag" said Bulbo, with little effort to lower his voice. "Makes a so called living selling remote warfare devices, bombs, missiles and so on. Obscene. Real war is sticking a bayonet in at close quarters and seeing guts come out. That's proper war that is, something noble and fine and decent about it, not all this technology stuff where you never see the enemy, inhuman and cold. Even watching remote TV images of guts come out isn't the same". "Pretty impressive, Bulbo" said the dapper man "but I think I've got something better". He pointed to two cardboard boxes with "BB" and "LB" chalked on them. "We'll see" growled Bulbo.

There were a lot of serious buyers, and a great deal of interest in the Siegfried Line. Bulbo was confident of getting a high bid. Just before the action began, Bulbo and Archie were having a rest and a well deserved coffee. Something fluttering on the nearest Pillbox. Bulbo walked over and pulled it off. A string vest and a pair of not quite white underpants marked FF. Bulbo exploded. He strode over to the other stall. "What is the meaning of this? He demanded, waving the garments. "Steady on old chap, I just rinsed my smalls and needed somewhere to dry them" said the dapper little man. "YOU BASTARD" screamed Bulbo, "YOU'VE BEEN HANGING OUT YOUR WASHING ON MY SIEGFRIED LINE".

The little man ended up head down in an empty tea chest. It took him several minutes to extract himself and wipe the coffee off his face. A face like thunder. He was not going to let this pass, that was clear. He walked to the box marked LB, picked it up and shook it in their direction. Something fell out and bounced towards them, rapidly swelling in size. It did not seem very dangerous to Archie, just something that looked like a big camping gas cylinder painted silver with fins on the end. It had "Little Boy" written on the side.


      
      
      

 

Submit Your Review for The Adventuresof Archie 5b - The Army Surplus Salesman's Tale
Required fields are marked with (*).
Your e-mail address will not be displayed.

Your Name*     E-mail*

City     State/Province     Country

Your Review (please be constructive!)*


Please Enter Code*:

Submit Your Rating for The Adventuresof Archie 5b - The Army Surplus Salesman's Tale

Worst     1     2     3     4     5     6     7     8     9     10     Best

COPYRIGHT NOTICE
© 2003 Xoggoth
STORYMANIA PUBLICATION DATE
March 2004
NUMBER OF TIMES TITLE VIEWED
1513
 

Copyright © 1998-2001 Storymania Technologies Limited. All Rights Reserved.